The beaver is a proud and noble animal

Katy and I harvested 98 chilies from our chili plant tonight. There are still more on it, but we realized that the main stalk had broken under its own weight with the recent winds. Kick-ass :)

I’ve just spent the last hour going over a dozen resumes for a job opening we have at work. Quite often I wonder what these people are thinking.

Sending me a generic cover letter doesn’t inspire me to really look at your cv. Sending a cover letter about the wrong job really doesn’t. Sending one full of typos means I don’t even try. In all cases, your cover letter is there to sell the high points, not tell me your life story.

A cv should be clear, concise and relevant. If you have more than 5 years experience, I don’t give a toss about your school grades. If you have less than 5 years experience, DO NOT PAD YOUR RESUME WITH EVERY TLA KNOWN TO MAN. It makes me think you’re either lying through your teeth or you don’t know what you’re talking about.

I do not need to know what sort of World of Warcraft character you play, nor which level you’re at. Same goes for what sports you play or what sort of music you listen to. I want to hire you, not date you.

Finally. Spell check. USE IT!!!

You’d think that it would be hard to spend 3000 pounds in 2 weeks when you’re not actually buying anything but you’d be wrong. Shit! Fuck! Brick!!!

And to top this evening off, I’ve been kicked out of my own bed because Katy is snoring so loudly I can still hear it with a pair of earplugs. And that fucking cat is still trying to break into the house.

Merry fucking Christmas.

Katy and I sometimes watch Man V Food as filler TV. The show is about a man who roams the US to face food challenges that local restaurants host as a matter of course (like eating 5 pounds of chicken wings in 30 minutes to win a t-shirt, an 8 pound sirloin steak to get your picture on the wall, or a 6-pound hoagie with 2 pounds of fries). So yeah. One TV critic describes it as the food version of Jackass. Every time we watch the show, we’re half-and-half drooling at the food that’s being prepared and appalled at the waste generated and the idiocy of it all.

   

 

We decided to do our own version of the silliness today. I made us a one-pound burger, with a quarter pound of bacon and three slices of cheese, topped with fried mushrooms and onions, pickles, lettuce, mayo and reggae reggae relish all on a grand rustique loaf. It was really good. It was huge. The scary bit? It’s not even in the Man V Food league in meal size. Still, it’s not something that I’m planning on doing again any time soon. I’m still stuffed from the thing!

Current Mood: Full

Please don’t put your toothbrush up your nose.

I was up until 4:30 am this morning reading a new book. I am no longer 18. This was stupid.

Current Mood: Tired

German sausage lovers can now study for a master’s degree in their favourite dish. Students learn how to appreciate the white sausage at the Sausage Academy in Neumarkt, set up by Norbert Wittman. There are also diploma courses covering which lagers, mustards and types of music go best with different varieties of sausage. So far 1,300 students have gained the diploma.

Current Mood: Amused

AAXFX QGLXN ITAPA ESKCI VKIUO
MQZEQ WIKSK BJIAZ IXVLL GOBJX

Current Mood: Amused

Seen on Slashdot:

“The FBI has limited resources, so it needs to prioritize what it works on. However, it’s difficult to see why dealing with copyright infringement seems to get more attention than identity theft or missing persons. In the past year, the FBI has announced a special new task force to fight intellectual property infringement, but recent reports have shown that both identity theft and missing persons have been downgraded as priorities by the FBI, to the point that there are a backlog of such cases.”

I’m reminded of the fictional story ‘Greenies’, by Al Steiner. It’s about the process that a Martian colony goes through to free itself from the corruption of its earthbound masters and gain independence. As part of the story, the modern-day equivalent of the FBI is used as a corporate hound-dog to track down “serious” crimes, like piracy and illegal file sharing. It still amazes me that – in real life – large conglomerates will spend millions to try and save a few thousands in losses. The story also talks about the mega-corporations that rule every aspect of life – something that we can see happening now with companies like Cargill (as a side note, do not ever eat a hamburger in the US).

So yeah. Maybe I’m cynical, but I really, really hope the future is more like Star Trek and less like Greenies. Given human nature, I’m expecting the worst.

Current Mood: Aggravated

Accordionated – being able to drive and refold a road map at the same time

Blogish – a variety of English that uses a large number of initialisms, frequently used on blogs

Dunandunate – the overuse of a word or phrase that has recently been added to your own vocabulary

Earworm – a catchy tune that frequently gets stuck in your head

Freegan – someone who rejects consumerism, usually by eating discarded food

Fumb – your large toe

Furgle – to feel in a pocket or bag for a small object such as a coin or key

Griefer – someone who spends their online time harassing others

Headset jockey – a telephone call centre worker

Museum head – feeling mentally exhausted and no longer able to take in information; Usually following a trip to a museum

Nonversation – a worthless conversation, wherein nothing is explained or otherwise Elaborated upon

Optotoxical – a look that could kill, normally from a parent or spouse

Peppier – a waiter whose sole job is to offer diners ground pepper, usually from a large pepper mill

Percuperate – to prepare for the possibility of being ill

Polkadodge – the dance that occurs when two people attempt to pass each other but move in the same direction

Pregreening – to creep forwards while waiting for a red light to change

Smushables – items that must be pack at the top of a bag to avoid being squashed

Stealth-geek – someone who hides their nerdy interests while maintaining a normal outward appearance

Vidiot – someone who is inept at the act of programming video recording equipment

Whinese – a term for the language spoken by children on lengthy trips

Wibble – the trembling of the lower lip just shy of actually crying

Wikism – a piece of information that claims to be true but is wildly inaccurate

Source: The Telegraph

Current Mood: Amused