{"id":36485,"date":"2017-07-09T14:29:24","date_gmt":"2017-07-09T14:29:24","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.flubu.com\/blog\/2017\/07\/09\/gods-walk-into-a-bar\/"},"modified":"2017-07-17T11:40:53","modified_gmt":"2017-07-17T11:40:53","slug":"gods-walk-into-a-bar","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.flubu.com\/blog\/2017\/07\/09\/gods-walk-into-a-bar\/","title":{"rendered":"Gods walk into a bar…\u00a0"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Jesus: Are you sure he’s one of yours? Because I didn’t make him. <\/p>\n

Satan: Please. Give me some credit. Even I have standards. <\/p>\n

Jesus: Buddha? Brahma? <\/p>\n

*both shrug their shoulders*<\/p>\n

Satan: Gaia? <\/p>\n

Gaia: *glowers*<\/p>\n

Satan: Right, right, sorry. Forgot about the whole pussy grabbing thing. <\/p>\n

Jesus: Cthulhu? <\/p>\n

Cthulhu: What sort of monster do you take me for? *sips tea*<\/p>\n

Satan: Well SOMEBODY cooked him up.<\/p>\n

Flying Spaghetti Monster: … <\/p>\n

Jesus: Wait… There’s no way you could… <\/p>\n

Flying Spaghetti Monster: Look…  It was my first time. I was a little drunk and someone asked for a ‘Tangerine Dream’  so I thought… <\/p>\n

Satan: *faceplams* Fucking newbies. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Jesus: Are you sure he’s one of yours? Because I didn’t make him.  Satan: Please. Give me some credit. Even I have standards.  Jesus: Buddha? Brahma?  *both shrug their shoulders* Satan: Gaia?  Gaia: *glowers* Satan: Right, right, sorry. Forgot about the whole pussy grabbing thing.  Jesus: Cthulhu?  Cthulhu: What sort of monster do you take…<\/p>\n

Read More “Gods walk into a bar…\u00a0”<\/span> »<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[132],"class_list":["post-36485","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-random-shit"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p3u9vK-9ut","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.flubu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/36485","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.flubu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.flubu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.flubu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.flubu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=36485"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.flubu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/36485\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":36554,"href":"https:\/\/www.flubu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/36485\/revisions\/36554"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.flubu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=36485"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.flubu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=36485"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.flubu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=36485"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}