Everything’s not lost

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The times, they are a changing.

From yesterday to today, nothing has physically changed. No decision has been made. Things are pretty much as they were 24-48h ago. Except now I have an immense feeling of dread and despair. I’m unconsciously humming coldplay. I’m thinking black thoughts. This is completely irrational behaviour and I know this. It’s not a normal response. It’s probably triggered by similar past events, but it doesn’t make it less real or easier to deal with.

I sure picked a fucking great time to quit smoking.

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Meet the newest gladiator: Bavalanche!

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Real Name: Bavalanche
Breed: Bulldog
Nickname(s): The Drool Doom

Height: Low to the ground, impossible to move
Weight: Classified (but the floor knows)
Speed: Slow start… unstoppable finish
Strength: Shockingly high for a creature that snores
Endurance: Infinite naps, short bursts of chaos

Forged in the couch cushions of Switzerland and fueled by raw, unfiltered farts, Bavalanche brings a wet, rumbling menace to the arena. What starts as a gentle drip quickly becomes a full-scale slobber disaster. Once he commits, there is no traction, no escape, only drool.

💥 Signature moves:

THE DROOL SLIDE – Sudden head shake creates a hazard zone no human can stand in
THE BAVE BLAST – Direct eye contact followed by an unstoppable slobber launch
THE NAP FAKE-OUT – Appears asleep… explodes into action
THE WRINKLE LOCK – Confuses opponents with sheer facial complexity

🏟️ Arena speciality:

The Eliminator – Turns the floor into a slip-and-fall nightmare
Powerball – Guards the ball by simply sitting on it
Joust – Unmoved. Unbothered. Slightly damp.

🎤 Catchphrase

“No traction, no mercy!”

🎶 Theme song

“LADIES AND GENTLEMEN…
MAKE SOME NOISE FOR… BAAAAAA—VAAAAA—LAAAAAANCHE!!!”
“HIDE YOUR SHOES… PROTECT YOUR SNACKS…
THE DROOL DOOM HAS ENTERED THE ARENA!”

*Bavalanche snorts, shakes head, drool flies in slow motion. Camera zooms. Crowd loses it.*

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Going old-school

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Been wanting to treat myself for a while and I finally pulled my finger out and got a hifi for Christmas. It’s second hand, older then Ben, but sounds really nice. Denon amp and CD charger and Bose speakers :) It’s got knobs and buttons and lots of cabling. In a nod to modernity, I also got a BT receiver so that we can stream from our phones. Now I just need to make sure Ben doesn’t nick it from me.

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