Day: March 10, 2005

1. The costumes are functional and fireproofed, not something silly made of silver lam, by a brocade addict.
2. Forget wimpy knives, how about a 2 hp, 14″ diameter abrasive cutoff saw that could take off a leg in two seconds. Instead of a one handed tenderizing mallet, try a 5 kg sledge on a 1 meter handle.
3. The ingredients supply weighs 800 tons, and covers half an acre.
4. Your torch isn't some wimpy hand held thing, only suitable for browning brul, its got a 6 tank gas manifold, and an oxygen tank as tall as you are.
5. The fire extinguisher is a “how many times” not an “just in case”
6. Your ingredients don't try to run away. They may take a crane to move, and might try to crush you however.
7. No giggly, squeaky voiced actress only there to be decorative. The co-host has a Ph.D., and created the show.
8. Which would you rather cut in half, a white delivery van or a live squid?
9. You aren't judged on beauty of presentation. Ugly, and menacing looking are desirable attributes.
10. Your fate is decided by the laws of physics, not the whims of a fortune teller turned food writer.

My ophthalmologist has dropped off the face of the planet. He's either dead or he skipped out of the country, cause nobody has seen kit nor kin of him for the past 6 months. Hell, he's cancelled my appointment 3 times since September of last year and the phone message on the clinic's phone says that the clinic will be closed until early JANUARY. I've just called the hospital where he used to be affiliated and they haven't heard from him either. Apparently, I'm not the only one who's thought to call the Vic cause the poor lady on the other end of the line was really flummoxed.

This sucks major donkey ballage, as I want a copy of my medical file to take with me.

This is a typical Boris pose :)