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Quote of the day – Russian Humour

Posted on January 31, 2014 By admin

Russian men losing years to vodka: spirit linked to 35% of cases where a man dies before age 55, with study citing national sport of spectacular drunkenness.
http://www.theguardian.com/world/2014/jan/31/russian-men-losing-years-to-vodka

Terry: Vera, did you know that 25% of Russian men die before the age of 55?
Vera: Yes, I did, my dad was one of them.

Stalin is giving a speech when somebody sneezes. He asks, “who did that?”. Silence. He says, “kill the first row”. He asks, “who did that?”. Silence. He says, “kill the second row”. He asks, “who did that?”. An arm shakes upwards and a small voice says “me”. “Bless you”, says Stalin.

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Quote of the day

Sam Vimes could parallel process. Most husbands can. They learn to follow their own line of thought while at the same time listening to what their wives say. And the listening is important, because at any time they could be challenged and must be ready to quote the last sentence in full. A vital additional skill is being able to scan the dialogue for telltale phrases such as "and they can deliver it tomorrow" or "so I've invited them for dinner?" or "they can do it in blue, really quite cheaply."
--(Terry Pratchett, The Fifth Elephant)

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