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The beaver is a proud and noble animal

The beaver is a proud and noble animal

Notes from a bemused canuck

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Month: February 2014

Why can I just see Bean doing this?

Posted on February 6, 2014 By admin

tatoo-ingl-s
Click to embiggen.

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Confessions d’un canard sex-toy

Posted on February 6, 2014February 6, 2014 By admin

416ZQHYE3GL._

In his wildest dreams, Sigmund is a majestic wild duck. Alas, the Almighty has decided otherwise and made him a delicious, vibrating pleasure object. One imagines too fast a thrilling existence, made of enjoyment and pleasure … Error! Sigmund has no luck. Our little friend will then spent his life wondering what his purpose in life is. To assist in his thoughts, his friend Elise, a small cow with a penis-shaped spot, turns out to be the ideal sounding board.

canard-sex-toy-2

canard-sex-toy-1

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For Katy

Posted on February 6, 2014 By admin

heart-on

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Powerpoint Karaoke

Posted on February 6, 2014 By admin

powerpoint_karaoke

I discovered a new concept today – even though it’s been around for a while now, it’s still new to me :) It’s called Powerpoint Karaoke. It’s a spin-off from the traditional Karaoke, however instead of singing songs, the participants must present an impromptu presentation based on a random presentation, projected on a screen, to an audience. The presentations can come from a sampling of images collected locally or by randomly downloading from the Internet.

The rules:

1. Participants get five minutes to speak
2. The slide decks are made by the facilitator/host
3. The slides auto advance every 15 seconds
4. There are no other rules
5. Audience votes on the winner

You have to play for comedy. There is no way to take the slides seriously since by design they are ridiculous. At best you are making the audience laugh, at worst they watch in silence as you struggle on stage. It’s purely stunt presenting. No one is there to learn or be inspired, at least not directly. There’s an element of wanting to watch cars crash in this event. It’s all in good fun, but also schadenfreudian. There is no way to be good at this. This is liberating. It really is more like experimental theater than anything like a public speech.

Here’s an example of 4 battle decks. Enjoy :)

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Let them eat cake

Posted on February 5, 2014 By admin

image

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But whyyyyyy, daddy?

Posted on February 5, 2014 By admin

image

He wanted to be just like me this morning, which included sleeping in our bed in jut his boxers, and then nicking my t-shirt.

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Battered husband syndrome

Posted on February 4, 2014 By admin

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Last night, Katy was having a bad dream and she thumped me on the head twice, with a fair bit of oomph. When I asked her WTF she was doing, the only answer I got was a sleepy “sorry, I thought you were a crow”.

Riiiiiight…

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On the way to making money, hopefully

Posted on February 4, 2014 By admin

I’ve invested a large part of my EBI end-of-contract money in a long-term fund platform offered by Generali International.

generali-funds

generali-pie

The portfolio is fairly well balanced:

currency distribution
% USD 27.5
% EUR 72.5
asset distribution
% BOND 37.14
% STOCK 44.06
% CASH 14.23
% OTHER 4.60
geographic distribution
% AMERICA 31.11
% EUROPE 38.61
% ASIA 30.20
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Never underestimate the english palate for tea

Posted on February 4, 2014February 4, 2014 By admin
That's a good brew, that!

That’s a good brew, that!

We have a proper englishman in our team. A northern lad through and through. We were talking the other day and he was complaining that while you can get decent coffee out of a machine, you can’t get a good cuppa. It’s just not doable. This morning, I challenged him to a blind taste test – a cuppa PG tip vs a special T English breakfast. He got it spot on, on the sip.

“I can’t say anything about wine and stuff, but I know my tea”

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Yet another quote of the day

Posted on February 3, 2014 By admin

failure

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Quote of the day

"Taxation, gentlemen, is very much like dairy farming. The task is to extract the maximum amount of milk with the minimum of moo. And I am afraid to say that these days all I get is moo."
--(Terry Pratchett, Jingo)

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