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Notes from a bemused canuck

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Month: March 2020

We are a dysfunctional family

Posted on March 24, 2020 By admin

Some people see the current covid-19 lockdowns as a way to build memories and spend quality time as a family. We see this, filled with dread, as a situation that can lead to murder or alcoholism.

As much as I love my son, he is being a giant shithead. Everything needs to be a confrontation. Everything needs to be yelled instead of spoken. We are, apparently, the most unfair idiots that walk the earth and exist only to pay for shit, frustrate him at every turn and make him angry. He, in our opinion, exists only to make stupid random noises, do whatever the hell he wants when he wants to, do nothing of what we actually ask of him and can’t grasp the simplest of concepts like don’t chew with your mouth open, close the light when you leave the room and leave the fucking cats alone.

So yeah.

We’ll either need lawyers or doctors, or both (definitively therapy) by the time this has cleared up.

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Bring your work to cat, indeed

Posted on March 23, 2020March 23, 2020 By admin

One of the big issues of working from home is discipline and motivation.

This does not help.

Neither does this, when you come back from the bathroom.

But at least the telecommuting memes are amusing:

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Pandemic confinement, week 3

Posted on March 23, 2020March 23, 2020 By admin

Ok, so it’s not an actual confinement, we’re still allowed to go out as long as reasonable precautions are taken – it would just seem that different people have different interpretations of what is reasonable in these… interesting times.

I’ve also managed to fix the slight oopsie I did to the media streamer PC. On the plus side, my storage space has tripled. I’ll need to order a 2nd 6TB HDD so that I can make a redundant copy, but at least we have one working version now.

Finally, it seems that all the parents are in agreement – it sucks to have kids out of school stuck at home.

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[recipe] Chocolate weißbier tear-and-share breakfast loaf

Posted on March 21, 2020March 19, 2020 By admin


320g all purpose flour
50g plus 1 tbs granulated sugar, divided
1 packet rapid rise yeast
180ml wheat beer
1/2 tsp vanilla
3 large egg yolk (room temperature)
60ml cup heavy cream (at least 35% fat content, room temperature)
1 tsp salt
45g softened butter
100g chocolate, chopped
Powdered sugar, optional

In the bowl of a stand mixer fitted with a dough hook add the flour, 50g granulated sugar and yeast.

Add the beer to a microwave safe bowl, microwave on high for 20 seconds, test temperate and repeat until beer reaches between 50C-55C – see note. Add the beer to the stand mixer, mix until most of the flour has been moistened.

Add the vanilla then the yolks, one at a time. Add the cream and salt.

Building up speed, beat on high until the dough comes together and gathers around the blade. The dough will be very soft.

Add dough to a lightly oiled bowl, cover and allow to sit at room temperature for 1 hour or until doubled in size.

Add dough to a lightly floured surface, roll into an 18 x 24 inch rectangle.

In a small bowl stir together the softened butter and the remaining 1 tablespoons sugar. Spread the butter/sugar mix evenly on the dough.

Cut the dough into strips about 3 inches wide. Cut each of the strips into 4 to 5 rectangles, each should be about the size of a deck of cards. You should have between 12 and 15 pieces. Sprinkle the pieces with the chopped chocolate, then stack up each one on top of another in a tower. Lay the stack into a loaf pan, like placing books on a shelf.

If making the loaf the night before, cover and allow to rise in the fridge for 12 hours. Reheat the oven to 350F/175C, allow the loaf to come to room temperate while the oven is pre-heating. Bake at 350 for 18-22 minutes or until golden brown.

If making the day of, preheat oven to 350F/175C, allow to sit at room temperate until doubled in size, about 20 minutes .Bake at 350 for 18-22 minutes or until golden brown.

Remove from loaf pan, sprinkle with powdered sugar prior to serving.

A note about yest and temperature:

55C–60C – Yeast cells die (thermal death point).

50C–55C – Water temperature for activating yeast designed to be mixed with the dry ingredients in a recipe.

40C–45C – Temperature of water for dry yeast reconstituted with water and sugar.

38C or lower – When yeast is mixed with water at too low a temperature, an amino acid called glutathione leaks from the cell walls, making doughs sticky and hard to handle.

27C–32C – Optimum temperature range for yeast to grow and reproduce at dough fermentation stage.

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[recipe] Cornish pasties

Posted on March 20, 2020March 18, 2020 By admin


For the pastry:
500g strong white bread flour, plus extra to dust
120g lard or white shortening
125g butter
1 tsp salt
175 ml cold water

For the filling:
400g good quality beef skirt, cut into cubes
300g potato, peeled and diced
150g swede, peeled and diced
150g onion, peeled and sliced
Clotted cream or butter

Also:
1 egg, beaten with a little milk

Add the salt to the flour in a large mixing bowl.

Rub the two types of fat lightly into flour until it resembles breadcrumbs.

Add water, bring the mixture together and knead until the pastry becomes elastic. This will take longer than normal pastry but it gives the pastry the strength that is needed to hold the filling and retain a good shape. This can also be done in a food mixer.

Cover with cling film and leave to rest for 3 hours in the fridge. This is a very important stage as it is almost impossible to roll and shape the pastry when fresh.

Roll out the pastry and cut into circles approx. 20cm diameter. A side plate is an ideal size to use as a guide.

Layer the vegetables and meat on top of the pastry, adding plenty of seasoning.

Bring the pastry around and crimp the edges together.

Glaze with egg and milk mixture.

Bake at 165 degrees C (fan oven) for about 50 – 55 minutes until golden.

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Pandemic confinement, week 2

Posted on March 19, 2020March 23, 2020 By admin

Right. Well. Things are going well.

An analyst from Imperial College finally managed to convince both the Blonde Chimp in the UK and the Oompah-Loompa in the US that waiting for herd immunity is a bad option and “it’s not just like the flu”.

 

Now if only they could get a clear message about containment measures, and staying the fuck out of large groups, preferably at home.

Speaking of Drumpf, his whole self-identity as a president has been that the stock market has never been stronger. That means that all his rich friends are happy with him and money is going into the right pockets. Well, about that….

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[recipe] Cured beef tenderloin

Posted on March 18, 2020March 17, 2020 By admin

2 cups sugar
2 cups kosher salt
12 whole black peppercorns, crushed
1 tsp crushed dried jalapeño powder or other hot chile powder
1 cup freshly squeezed orange juice
1/2 cup citrus-flavored vodka, such as Absolut Mandarin or Citron
1/2 cup olive oil
1 tablespoon low-sodium soy sauce
1 2-inch piece ginger root, minced (2 tbsp)
16 large mint leaves
1 pound / 500g center-cut beef tenderloin roast

Have ready a loaf pan in which the tenderloin will fit snugly; the meat must be buried in the sugar-salt mixture to cure properly. Line the pan with plastic wrap, allowing for enough wrap to hang over all sides of the pan.

Combine the sugar, salt, peppercorns and chili powder in a medium bowl; mix well. Add the orange juice, vodka, oil, soy sauce, ginger and mint leaves; mix well. Pour into the lined loaf pan.

Place the beef tenderloin in the loaf pan. Turn it over several times, rubbing the curing mixture all over the meat. Close the plastic wrap tightly over the top, then use a heavy can or clean brick to weight the meat. Refrigerate for 10 hours.

Remove the beef from the pan, brushing off the curing mixture. Use paper towels to pat the meat dry. Use fresh plastic wrap to tightly wrap the meat, then place it in the freezer for 30 to 40 minutes or until it is partially frozen. That will make the meat easier to slice. Discard the sugar-salt mixture.

About 30 minutes before you are ready to serve, cut the meat crosswise into very thin slices, using a mandoline if possible. Arrange the slices on a platter and let stand for 20 minutes or until the beef is at approximately room temperature.

Notes: The beef needs 6 to 8 hours’ curing time. It should be served within 1 day after the curing is complete.

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Mistakes were made

Posted on March 18, 2020 By admin

Well fuck.

I’m one fell swoop, I managed to delete 1.7TB of data from my media streaming PC. I was trying to do something that would save me a few MB, if that, and fix a minor source of irritation. It ended up biting me quite stupendously in the ass.

Note to future self. When using Linux 1-liners,please be wary of positional arguments and always RTFM!

find /multimedia -name *.txt -delete

: removes all text files found under path /multimedia

find -delete /multimedia -name *.txt

: removes 1.7 TB of data

From the find(1) man:

Warnings: Don’t forget that the find command line is evaluated as an expression, so putting -delete first will make find try to delete everything below the starting points you specified.

And then you cry.

But what about your backup, you ask? Well, I do have one, but it’s 6-month out of date, which is not a major thing, and it’s also currently in a location that is difficult to access. Alternative measures are being taken to restore the data.

It’s not a critical loss. I’ll get most, if not all, the data back. Its just incredibly frustrating and involved a serious sphincter-clench, followed by an Oh-shit-I’m-stupid moment I could have done without.

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Working from home is the new normal

Posted on March 17, 2020March 17, 2020 By admin

Given that I’ll be working from home for the foreseeable future, we rearranged some furniture to put the desk in the bedroom – out of the common living space – to allow me to teleconference in (relative) peace.

It also means that my kanban board is at work, so I’ve rebuilt it with what I had at hand. Yes, I could use a cloud solution but I’ve found that post-its on a board work best for me…

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State of emergency

Posted on March 17, 2020March 17, 2020 By admin


Switzerland in a state of “extraordinary situation” until April 19

The Federal Council decreed Monday the state of emergency in Switzerland because of the coronavirus. Citing an “extraordinary situation”, the executive decided to take new measures valid for all the cantons without consultation.

Restaurants, bars, non-essential shops as well as places of leisure and entertainment will therefore remain closed until at least April 19. The Federal Council also ensured that the food supply for the whole population was assured, and that food stores and pharmacies remained open. Also open are delivery services, post offices, banks and petrol stations. Coop and Migros, however, are overwhelmed by requests for home delivery. Their respective sites, Coop @ home and LeShop, are no longer able to meet demand.

Border controls with Germany, France and Austria will be introduced, as was already the case with Italy.

The Federal Council called up 8,000 soldiers at the service of the health system, logistics and security until the end of June. This is unheard of since World War II.

Public transport is reduced. From Thursday March 19, international trains will only run to border stations and tourism offers are cancelled.

While Switzerland is now living in slow motion, France has entered general confinement as have done previously Spain and Italy. Europe is closing its borders to curb the spread of the coronavirus, described by the WHO as “the major global health crisis of our time”.

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