The beaver is a proud and noble animal

500ml wheat beer, heated to 50C
2 teaspoons active dry yeast
800g all-purpose flour
2 tbsp granulated sugar
1 tbsp salt

1/4 cup baking soda
1 tablespoon barley malt syrup, rice syrup, or dark brown sugar
1 large egg, whisked with 2 tablespoons warm water

Coarse sea salt or pretzel salt

Make the pretzel dough: Combine the warm beer and yeast in the bowl of a stand mixer (or a medium-sized bowl, if kneading by hand). Let stand a few minutes, then stir to dissolve the yeast. Add flour, sugar, and salt. Stir with a stiff spatula to form a floury, shaggy dough.

Knead the dough: Knead the dough with a stand mixer fitted with a dough hook attachment on low speed for 5 minutes. If the dough is very sticky after 1 minute, add flour a tablespoon at a time until it forms a ball.

Let the dough rise: Clean out the bowl, film it with oil, and return the dough to the bowl. Cover and let rise somewhere warm until the dough is doubled in bulk, about 1 hour.

Divide the dough: Turn the dough out onto a lightly floured work surface. Use a bench scraper to divide the dough into 12 equal pieces (around 120g each)

Shape the pretzels: Working with one piece of dough a time, roll the dough into a long, skinny rope against the counter using the palms of your hands. Aim for a rope about 20 inches long. If it shrinks back on you, set it aside, roll another piece of dough, and come back to it after it’s rested a few minutes.

Lift the ends of the rope toward the top of your work surface and cross them. Cross them one more time to make a twist, then fold the twist back down over the bottom loop to form a pretzel shape.

Set the pretzel on a parchment-lined baking sheet and continue shaping the rest of the pretzels. When all the pretzels are shaped, cover them loosely and set them aside to rise until puffy, 20 to 30 minutes.

Preheat the oven to 450F/220C. Place a rack in the middle-bottom position.

Prepare the water bath: When the pretzels are starting to look puffy, measure 8 cups of water into a large, wide pot and set over high heat. Make sure the pot has high sides because the water will foam, nearly doubling in volume, when you add the baking soda.

Bring the water to a rapid simmer, then add the baking soda and the barley malt syrup. The baking soda will make the water foam up the sides of the pot. Stir to dissolve the baking soda and syrup, then reduce the heat to medium to maintain a simmer.

Boil the pretzels: Lower 2 to 3 pretzels into the water bath — as many as will fit without crowding. Simmer for 30 seconds, then use a slotted spoon to flip the pretzels over. Simmer for another 30 seconds, then scoop the pretzels out of the water and return them to the baking sheet. While in the water bath, the pretzels will puff and take on a doughy, puckered appearance. Repeat with the remaining pretzels.

Brush with egg and sprinkle with salt: Once all the pretzels have been dipped in the water bath, brush them with the egg and water mixture and sprinkle them with salt.

Optional: top with cheddar, bacon, cheese & jalapeño, poppy seeds or whatever topping you like.

Bake the pretzels: Bake the pretzels until they are deep brown and glossy, 12 to 15 minutes.

Cool and eat! Transfer the pretzels to a cooling rack and let sit until cool enough to handle.

Update: 2nd attempt!