The beaver is a proud and noble animal

100g brown sugar
2 teaspoons ground cinnamon, divided
2 large apples, peeled and chopped to 1cm cubes
110g butter, room temperature
130g granulated sugar
2 eggs
1.5 teaspoons pure vanilla extract
190g all-purpose flour
1.75 teaspoons baking soda
125ml + 1 tablespoon milk, divided
60g powdered sugar

Preheat the oven to 350F/175C. Grease a 9-inch-by-5-inch loaf pan. Set aside.

In a small bowl, combine the brown sugar with 1 teaspoon of the cinnamon.

In another bowl, combine the diced apples with the remaining 1 teaspoon of cinnamon and stir to mix. Set aside.

In a large bowl, cream together the butter and the granulated sugar. Beat the eggs in one at a time until completely mixed. Add the vanilla extract and mix.

In a medium bowl, whisk together the flour and baking soda. Add the milk and mix until smooth. Add the flour and baking soda mix to the butter mixture, and stir until well-blended.

Layer batter, apples and brown sugar mixture. Pour half of the batter into the prepared loaf pan. Layer half of the apple mixture on top of the batter, followed by half of the brown sugar mixture. Gently press the apples into the batter. Add the remaining batter to the pan, followed by the remaining apples and brown sugar mixture. Lightly press the apples into the batter and swirl the brown sugar between the apple chunks and into the batter.

Bake for 50 to 60 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. Allow to cool for 15 minutes on a wire rack before removing from the pan.

While the bread cools, prepare the glaze. In a small bowl, combine the powdered sugar with the remaining 1 tablespoon of milk. Mix until smooth, and then drizzle over the cooled bread. Drizzle frosting glaze on apple fritter bread

1/3 homemade pepper vodka
2/3 homemade V8 juice
tabasco
soy sauce
tsp horseradish (alternatively, dijon mustard)
celery stalk
celery salt
pepper

Top with whatever you want, but make it big. And stupid. Chicken wings, shrimp, ham-wrapped cheese, pretzels, hot peppers, onion rings, fish fingers, pickles, olives, smoky maple bacon, lemon slice, rosemary sprigs, sliders, sausage, smoked brisket and pulled pork…

Pepper vodka:
Fill an empty plastic 500ml plastic bottle with any sub-standard imported vodka you can find. Dump in a handful of whole peppercorns. Then seal the container and stick it in the freezer for two weeks. The vodka will become infused with the peppercorn and the result is an alarmingly drinkable spicy beverage. Alone, this concoction makes for good late night sipping vodka.

V8 juice:
8 cups tomato, diced
1 cup carrot, diced
Small slivers of beet
2 tablespoon soy sauce
1 teaspoon sea salt
1/2 teaspoon cracked pepper
2 cup water, divided
1/2 cup spinach
1 tablespoon parsley

Combine the tomatoes, carrots, beet, soy sauce, salt, pepper, and 1/2 of the water in a saucepan. Bring to a boil and then reduce heat. Let simmer, covered, for 20 minutes. Add the spinach and parsley and simmer for another five minutes, keeping the pan covered. Remove from heat and let cool for ten minutes. Pour in blender, add remaining 1/2 water, and purée until smooth — about two minutes. Strain through a fine-mesh sieve and serve chilled.

Update: One more stupid idea: meatball glass Bloody Mary shots. WANT!!!

2 x 795g tins whole tomatoes (do not drain) – equivalent to 20-24 tomatoes. 
8 fresh thyme sprigs
2 tablespoons olive oil, divided
Kosher salt
Freshly ground black pepper
Red pepper flakes (optional)
1 large yellow onion, diced
1/4 cup (55g) tomato paste
1L low-sodium vegetable broth

Arrange a rack in the middle of the oven and heat to 220C/425F.

Line a rimmed baking sheet with parchment paper. Remove the whole tomatoes from the tins (reserving the juice), cut them in half if large, and lay them out in a single layer on the baking sheet. 

Scatter the thyme sprigs over the tomatoes and drizzle with 1 tablespoon of the oil. Season with salt, pepper, and a pinch of red pepper flakes, if using. Roast until soft and caramelized, 30 to 35 minutes.

Meanwhile, heat the remaining 1 tablespoon of oil in a Dutch oven over medium-high heat until shimmering. Add the onion, season with salt and pepper, and sauté until translucent and softened, about 5 minutes. Add the tomato paste and sauté until the paste has deepened in color, about 2 minutes more. Remove from the heat.
When the tomatoes are ready, discard the thyme sprigs. Transfer the tomatoes to the pot, then add the reserved tomato juice in the cans and the vegetable broth. Stir to combine and bring to a boil. Reduce the heat to maintain a gentle simmer, cover the pot, and simmer 20 minutes.

Purée the soup in with an immersion blender until smooth. Season with salt and pepper as needed.

INGREDIENTS
For the pancakes:
2 egg yolks
2 egg whites, whipped
40g sugar
320ml milk (more if the batter is too thick)
45g butter, melted
1 teaspoon of vanilla extract
200g (1.5cup) flour
30g (0.25cup) cocoa powder
2 1/2 teaspoon baking powder
100g chocolate, finely chopped
1 tablespoon butter or oil for cooking

For the chocolate ganache:
250ml heavy cream
225g chocolate chips

PREPARATION
1. In a large bowl, mix together yolks and sugar, while still whisking, add milk
2. Carefully fold in whipped egg whites with a spoon rather than a whisk.
3. Add and mix the melted butter and the vanilla.
4. In another large bowl, mix the sieved flour, cocoa powder, and the baking powder.
5. Form a little well in the middle and pour the milk and eggs mixture. Stir until the batter is smooth.
6. Mix in the chopped chocolate. Let the batter sit for 15-20 minutes.
7. To make the ganache, in a small saucepan, heat the heavy cream, without letting it boil.
8. Take off the heat, add the chocolate chips to the cream and mix until perfectly smooth.
9. Over low to medium heat, pour 1/4 cup of pancake batter on a well-oiled pan.
10. When bubbles start to form on the surface of the pancake, flip and cook it for a minute on the other side.
11. When the pancakes are ready, pour the chocolate ganache on top (if the ganache has hardened while you were making the pancakes, you can microwave it for 15-20 seconds).