Me: I’m going to be good this Christmas
Me to Me: I’m going to eat all the food, drink all the booze, and smoke all the fags in the world.
Tag: random shit
My auto-correct needs counselling
Freddie, the stoner reindeer
Life was good for Freddie until the man caught him flying under the influence. His licence got revoked for 24 months and he’s now earning pocket money as a Christmas display.
Weedy Wonka, the ganja man
Porn comments, with lego
It takes a special breed of person to comment on the bottom of porn videos, but it takes an even more inventive person to turn those comments into something infinitely greater. Despite the difficulty, this is exactly what one person has done. Imgur user icanlegothat searched out the most deplorable and hilarious comments from Reddit’s amateur porn ‘Gonewild’ thread, and re-created them with LEGOS. Thank the lord for the internet, what would we do without it?
That moment when
… you realise that Tommy Chong voices a character in a Disney movie.
Martha & Snoop’s Potluck Dinner Party
Must. Watch. This.
Fo’ schizzle!
We know this is intentionally exaggerated but still love the juxtaposition. Martha’s side of the adjoining kitchen is outfitted in tasteful white and copper, and her fridge plays opera when opened. Snoop’s side is decked out in purple and gold and decorated with the front grill of a ’64 Impala, and his fridge plays rap when opened.
Peanuts Floyd
Unanticipated day off
On my way home last night, I did a silly thing and forgot my keys at the office. No big deal.
Today, as we dropped off the car to get its two-year service, Katy left her house keys with the car keys. No big deal.
After taking the bus/train back home, we realised that neither of us had keys to get into the house. Oops.
My sensible plan to work from home today got locked out. So Katy and I had a impromptu date day.
Look at my horse!
I can’t believe that I’ve never tortured the oldies with this before!! Shocking lack of hindsight on my part.
Look at my horse
My horse is amazing
Give it a lick!
Mmm! It tastes just like raisinsHave a stroke of its mane
It turns into a plane
And then he turns back again
When you tug on his winkyOoh, that’s dirty!
Do you think so?
Well, I better not show you where the lemonade is made
Sweet lemonade
Mmm, sweet lemonade
Sweet lemonade
Yeah, sweet lemonadeGet on my horse!
I’ll take you ’round the universe
And all the other places, too
I think you’ll find that the universe pretty much covers everything
Shut up, woman, get on my horse